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Portage Lakes, Ohio —
Now that my daughter Maggie is 10 years old, she needs less supervision and is largely self-sufficient. As her mom, I admit seeing her shift from dependent to more independent is a beautiful thing, though at times it does make me feel a bit wistful for her younger years.
However, with each new stage of Maggie’s life, there are blessings and challenges. The blessing of her current stage is the ability to help herself, and sometimes me, with a decent amount of responsibilities.
The latest challenge?
Logistics.
Our household is comprised of two busy people trying to get from point A to point Z, and everywhere in between. Maggie needs a driver more than she needs a babysitter, these days. Lately, it seems I spend a lot of valuable time trying to organize how I’m going to get my daughter to social events, dance classes, day camps and other activities. My Google calendar is filled with her events, as well as mine. And, as things often go, they usually conflict. Sometimes, it seems as if we are doing too much. Maybe it is time to make some cuts, but Maggie is just as unwilling as I am to give up the activities we enjoy, as well as the ones which are just everyday life responsibilities.
My status as a single mom certainly doesn’t help the situation – the responsibility for Maggie’s arrangements falls mainly on me. While I have secret fantasies of someday morphing into a superwoman, so far, I am not able to be in more than one place at a time. More often than not I find myself completely stressed by the wheres, whens and hows of our lives.
Relying on others for help has always made me feel uncomfortable and indebted. Having Maggie has forced me to ask others for help when needed, and lately it seems as if I need help quite a bit. I have a wonderful group of friends who are generous, kind people and I don’t know what we would do without them. And, while I try to help my friends with the things in their lives that are challenging, I can’t help but wonder if they cringe when they see my name come up on their Caller ID.
I feel like I am wearing them out with my requests.
Fortunately, Maggie and I have found two possible solutions. Her idea is far cooler, but mine is more practical. My solution is to hire a responsible college or high school student who will drive Maggie a couple of places weekly when I need to be in class, or working. Maggie’s idea is simple and born of her fascination with technology: use all of the money in her savings account to purchase a self-driving Google car, similar to the one tested this past spring by Steve Mahan, a man who is almost entirely blind.
I think we are going to have to come up with a compromise between these two ideas, though Maggie is still lobbying for her solution.
Somehow, I have a feeling she might be safer in a self-driving car, than with a teenager who is a new driver.
I’m still looking into the superpower thing. At least the cape could be fun…
Now that my daughter Maggie is 10 years old, she needs less supervision and is largely self-sufficient. As her mom, I admit seeing her shift from dependent to more independent is a beautiful thing, though at times it does make me feel a bit wistful for her younger years.
However, with each new stage of Maggie’s life, there are blessings and challenges. The blessing of her current stage is the ability to help herself, and sometimes me, with a decent amount of responsibilities.
The latest challenge?
Logistics.
Our household is comprised of two busy people trying to get from point A to point Z, and everywhere in between. Maggie needs a driver more than she needs a babysitter, these days. Lately, it seems I spend a lot of valuable time trying to organize how I’m going to get my daughter to social events, dance classes, day camps and other activities. My Google calendar is filled with her events, as well as mine. And, as things often go, they usually conflict. Sometimes, it seems as if we are doing too much. Maybe it is time to make some cuts, but Maggie is just as unwilling as I am to give up the activities we enjoy, as well as the ones which are just everyday life responsibilities.
My status as a single mom certainly doesn’t help the situation – the responsibility for Maggie’s arrangements falls mainly on me. While I have secret fantasies of someday morphing into a superwoman, so far, I am not able to be in more than one place at a time. More often than not I find myself completely stressed by the wheres, whens and hows of our lives.
Relying on others for help has always made me feel uncomfortable and indebted. Having Maggie has forced me to ask others for help when needed, and lately it seems as if I need help quite a bit. I have a wonderful group of friends who are generous, kind people and I don’t know what we would do without them. And, while I try to help my friends with the things in their lives that are challenging, I can’t help but wonder if they cringe when they see my name come up on their Caller ID.
I feel like I am wearing them out with my requests.
Fortunately, Maggie and I have found two possible solutions. Her idea is far cooler, but mine is more practical. My solution is to hire a responsible college or high school student who will drive Maggie a couple of places weekly when I need to be in class, or working. Maggie’s idea is simple and born of her fascination with technology: use all of the money in her savings account to purchase a self-driving Google car, similar to the one tested this past spring by Steve Mahan, a man who is almost entirely blind.
I think we are going to have to come up with a compromise between these two ideas, though Maggie is still lobbying for her solution.
Somehow, I have a feeling she might be safer in a self-driving car, than with a teenager who is a new driver.
I’m still looking into the superpower thing. At least the cape could be fun…
