Despite being a short month, February has a long list of odd holidays.

Wednesday is Spunky Old Broads Day, which is the celebrated holiday of Spunky Old Broads Month.

Don’t act spunky or you’ll show your age.

It’s also Working Naked Day and Hula in The Coola Day, both of which encourage people in the dead of winter to wear little or no clothing in low temperatures.

Sounds to me as though you’d have to be pretty spunky to celebrate those holidays.

Despite being a short month, February has a long list of odd holidays.

Oh, there are the traditional special occasions. Feb. 2 is Groundhog Day. Feb. 5 is Super Bowl Sunday. Feb. 20 is Presidents Day. Feb. 22 is Ash Wednesday. Feb. 26 is the day of the Daytona 500.

Hey, it’s important to some of us.

Feb. 12 is Grammy Awards Day, and Academy Awards Night is Feb. 26. Those both have gotten to be big enough occasions that we find it necessary to celebrate them with arguments over the remote control.

Wait! Feb. 14 is Valentine’s Day. Definitely don’t want to forget that. Guys, I’m sorry. We all were very close to getting the silent treatment.

February also is the month in which an assortment of rather strange-sounding celebrations fall.

Feb. 4 is Quacker Day, for example, and Feb. 9 is Read in the Bathtub Day. Feb. 13 is Get a Different Name Day.

Feb. 5 is Dump Your Significant Jerk Day, which begins Dump Your Significant Jerk Week. It’s followed by Satisfied Staying Single Day on Feb. 11. Six days is enough to get over the goof, I guess. By the way, besides being Valentine’s Day, Feb. 14 also is Quirky Alone Day, in case that satisfied attitude turns strange. And, this being a leap year, men can celebrate Bachelor’s Day on Feb. 29.

Even though it has the most romantic of holidays in it, February — officially Relationship Wellness Month — seems to be a fairly solitary month.

In fact, Feb. 1 through Feb. 7 is Solo Diners Eat Out Week. Feb. 13-19 is International Flirting Week, so apparently even love is being outsourced.

Speaking of love, does anybody else wonder why Getting Dizzy Week, which is Feb. 8-14, is the same week as Love Makes the World Go Round; But Laughter Keeps Us From Getting Dizzy Week?

The two seem to conflict.

There is a serious side to February, of course. It’s listed as both National Black History Month and National African American History Month. The events that are held to recognize those designations offer insight into events in our history and a hope for our future.

Still, the minute we start feeling that we’re celebrating something of significance, it dawns on us that we are soon going to be starting Return Shopping Carts to the Supermarket Month, Just Say No to PowerPoint Week (Feb. 5-11), and Extra Terrestrial Culture Day (Feb. 14).

Now, this is where it really gets odd.

Feb. 8 is Laugh and Get Rich Day. Feb. 18 is Cow Milked While Flying In An Airplane Day. Feb. 20 is Northern Hemisphere Hoodie Hoo Day. Feb. 22 is Inconvenience Yourself Day. Feb. 25 is International Sword Swallowers Day.

It all makes me think of Feb. 26, which is For Pete’s Sake Day.

Contact Gary Brown at gary.brown@cantonrep.com.