Based on what we’ve seen, the bin Ladens led a markedly shabby existence for billionaires. But the so-called $1 million compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan, could use a good scrubbing, and some decent furniture. And sheets.

When it was learned that Osama bin Laden was holed up with three of his wives and 17 kids under one roof, comedian Jay Anthony Brown wisecracked that the world’s most-wanted terrorist likely called the Navy SEALs on himself.

“He probably told them ‘Just kill me,’ ” Brown said.

Based on what we’ve seen, the bin Ladens led a markedly shabby existence for billionaires. But the so-called $1 million compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan, could use a good scrubbing, and some decent furniture. And sheets.

State of women

Bin Laden was a crazy, murderous sociopath, but he wasn’t stupid. Reportedly, each of the Mrs. bin Ladens lived on a separate floor. Yet, even so, imagine being sequestered with 17 bored, squabbling and whiny kids, and three women who are not only in constant competition for your time and attention but also are demanding that you spring for better sofas and carpet.

After all, you marry for better, for worse. Not for lunch.

Yeah. Osama called Obama.

But the episode also speaks to the awful state of womanhood in many pockets of the world, where women have no real options and no say in their own destiny; where just going to school is viewed as rebellion.

It’s not unheard of for Third World families to sell off their little daughters to adult men to pay off a debt. It’s not unheard of for those daughters to commit suicide.

It’s believed that bin Laden, who married a total of six women, paid a $5,000 dowry to his youngest wife’s family when she was about 15.

Ick factor aside, we know it doesn’t take much to turn a young girl’s head, but how did Sada Amal Ahmed Abdel-Fatah al-Sada become so smitten with his blue-bearded fanaticism?

According to an Associated Press report, al-Sada was happy at the prospect of marriage, even though she didn’t know bin Laden from the neighbor kid’s grandpa.

Perhaps it was the mood lighting. Al-Sada reportedly first encountered her future husband in his cave near the Afghan border, where they enjoyed a wedding lunch.

Mrs. martyr

It’s also said that bin Laden gave all his wives the option of leaving Afghanistan, but al-Sada expressed the desire to be martyred with him. She nearly got her wish when the SEALs shot her in the leg as she tried to shield bin Laden.

And some of you won’t even fix your husband’s breakfast.

Among the items recovered from the bin Laden’s compound was an herbal concoction that acts like Viagra. We baby boomers regularly fool ourselves into thinking we still own the night, but for whom do you think Viagra was invented?

The last known video of a grizzled bin Laden wrapped in a blanket while watching himself on TV almost makes you forget why so many people wanted him dead. Almost. The only thing missing on the pathetic video is an old-man rant about stepping on his lawn.

In some Islamic countries, Muslim men may marry as many as four wives, but most don’t because, as any man anywhere can tell you, one wife is plenty.

Osama bin Laden was smart enough to elude punishment for 10 years. Or maybe not.

Contact Charita Goshay at charita.goshay@cantonrep.com.